Let it go..

看来我是一年才上来写一次吧..
去年的这个时候，我是充实，开心和幸福的..今年的现在，我是低落，低潮和看不开的..
三言两语并不能把我心里头的话说清，那涌上心头的感觉是非墨笔能形容的..
我努力埋葬所有的一切，可那一切却不断把我给埋没掉..
脑子里不断地说服但心里却一直把一切都推翻..
无论梦里，心里，甚至五脏六腑里，骨子里，都是你..越想把你放掉可你却把我牢得越紧...
你，曾经是我的推动力，如今却是我的拖阻力..
到底要怎样才能把你给放掉，忘掉，丢掉.. 而你，是怎么可以那么潇洒自如..
你，就是那颗导火线，星星之火，可以燎原..

The Graduate's Stage

I stepped on the stage since I were 17, there gain me a lot, experience a lot.
Friendship, true friendship I mean. I never ever thought can get the real friendship on this stage and its lasting now still. We hold each other, support each other with our true color.. Hahaha
We got the back when either one got in trouble. We went through lot of things went through few pageant final together and brain storm together.. Figured out everything together. That's a sweet wonderful memory of us..
And now everyone had graduate from the stage and only left me alone..suppose back on stage when I get fully prepare.. But there's an opportunity so happen in front of me.: and I decided take the challenge and step back on the stage in a rushing mood.. The pressures, the stresses, all the hope come in at the same time..
The only thing I can do is just get ready, and do all the best!!!
I believe and I got faith to myself that I could graduate!!

Little penguin need growth

I don't know I only blog when I emo.
Maybe I got no way to express my feeling..
These days I learn "Decent" & "Love".
Decent is easy.. But I think I will never understand what's love..
Maybe I were fighting too much for love and happiness..that's why I always get hurt.. I'm insecure as usual.

You will get a harsh fall if you can't fall in love..

Smile with Love,
Pat

Another Valentine's Day

New year, Chinese New Year all passed, but i thought those were just yesterday.
Now here we come another sweet pink festival, Valentines day.. I can feel the loves and sweet are just in the air, all around me. But why this is a emo festival to me??
I received my valentines presents. It was happy on the moment, look at those expensive branded stuff.. But the happiness just disappear after a while time.
What I want is not these. No the expensive branded stuff, all those things are just bonus in love to me. What i really want is love. Just could you with me when I sad or down. Pull me up when I fall, lend me the shoulder and give me a hug when I cry. Or just me a normal couple day?
Hmmm.. Writing this post about emo valentines on Sunday afternoon alone is sad.

Chill with love,
Pat

Amazing 4 days 3 nights..

Admitted in ward after since I was 8years old..
Friends came and left.. I'm alone at the the end of the day..
I'm thinking.. Am I cheating myself?? I'm actually not a happy girl.. I just happy go lucky.. With short Athena..Lolz..
I realize that I'm always alone when comes to the time I really need someone with me.. How sad it is.. But the other way round is that independent?? I had no idea..
After this incident.. I think I should make some change.. Good luck!

Pat,
With Loves.

Back To The Stage

It's been a while I never blog.. Things happen.. A lot.. Happening, sad, drown, well done..ditch?? Lolz..
Cut my hair short it mean I'm officially from " old news papper " turn into a normal person which I mean the real ordinary girl.. From devil to angel. Lolz!!
But things will always change now a days.. Devil can't really hide, so I'm an angel with horn and tail now.. Working permanent office job and less modelling, decided after down from the miss Malaysia pageant 2months ago.. But from I.T executive turn to event company sales and marketing executive. Beside working hard still at part time modelling, pageant so and so, I'm actually finding my connection back.. By losing my phone I do hate the empty feeling very much!
Last but not least, I'm officially 21st this year!! Ahahahah!! Set a plan and I'm working it on!! Keep it up!!

-No pain No gain Not again-

Loves,
Pat

I'm back

I don't know how long that I never log in my blog..

Im suddenly have the feeling to blog tonight..

I been through quite a lot of things for this while..

Same old thing,which is fell down,cry,learn,stand up, and keep walking..

It's better to be alone with yourself for the rest of your life than together with a bad company..

It ain't about how hard you hit, it's about how hard you can get hit...and keep moving forward!

Sometimes thing get in your path, and you have a choice..

You can either smash right into them, or you can adjust and move around..

But you have to do one or the other in order to move forward..

Being great at something is going to change it. Being a part of something special makes you special..

A strong person knows how to keep their life in order. Even with tears in their eyes, they still manage to say " I'm OK " with a smile..

I had a meaningful and heart to heart talk with friends..and I finally feel that I have friends around me.. I feel the happiness.. And I have my lovely aunt and family with me..

It's hard at the beginning of my, but I found something and learn in that..and now I'm starting to learn happily in my life..find it, organise it and hold it appreciate it..

I think I will be the happiness person and truly get my happiness! =)

Friends, I know you all will support me! I will always love you all !!

With love,

Pat